Lou Holtz, a famous US college football coach known for his wit and philosophical comments considers three questions which are central to his personal thoughts about being successful with people.  If the answer to all three of these questions is ‘yes’ then he is convinced that success is inevitable.

The questions are

1.       Can people trust me to do what’s right?

2.       Am I committed to doing my best?

3.       Do I care about other people and show it?

Embedded in these questions are the themes of personal excellence and commitment to the other person.  In the cases of a coach it is commitment to the athlete and recognising that they are foremost a person and also an athlete.

These are powerful questions and they can be reworded from the athlete’s perspective; the athlete can ask

1.       Can I trust you?

2.       Are you committed to excellence?

3.       Do you care about me?

If the athlete can answer ‘yes’ to these questions about the coach, then the relationship is likely to be long and fruitful.

Whether or not the athlete asks these questions about the coach, they will still be unconsciously searching for the answers.  If there is a negative answer to any of these questions, then the athlete will likely being looking to someone else for support in their pursuits.